The Bum Blog
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Homeless Poetry
I thought I might make a rare appearence here today on the Bum Blog.
This morning the (newly shaven) Angry Yeller had a new sign: "Homeless Poetry." I think that if you gave him money he'd write you a poem or something, but I generally ignore the filthy bum, so I wasn't going to find out the specifics.
ANyway, I was thinking of some good poems about him.
The Valentine's Day Poem:
Roses are Red,
Angry Yeller's hair is shaggy
He'd probably suck your dong,
for some weed in a baggy
The Limerick:
There once was a bum out on Steck
Who was really a disheveled wreck
He had no real job
ANd he lives like a slob
But panhandling's a pretty good paycheck.
The Haiku:
Dirty, smelly bum
Stands on corners; begs for change
He'd rather have beer
I'd do the Sonnet or an Ode, but that's a lot of work, especially for someone I pretend to ignore each morning on the way to work.
Thursday, July 22, 2004
The art of the sign
Spotted yesterday at Research and Capitol of Texas:
I used to have a handle
on Life...But it broke
Thank You... God Bless
The bum in question bore a weathered, dirty resemblance to Russell Hammond (Billy Crudup) from Almost Famous. Imagine if Stillwater broke up in the late-70's, and Hammond was never able to find a new band. Then his life went down the toilet and he relocated to Austin, because he heard some BS about this being the "Live Music Capital of the World." Unable to find a new band or a gig, because Vallejo, Soul Hat and Bob Schneider were always hogging the venues every night, he soon found himself on the street, making goofy signs to try and panhandle enough money to record that killer demo.
What am I saying? That bum probably makes more money than I do.
